A New Chapter

I’m finally done with college, sort of, and moved out for good. I’m not sure what happens next, but I think I deserve a break from work and exams and stuff.

Going through this pandemic, getting my knee injured and not fully recovering even now, and losing my home, pets, and most of my things while going through college courses was hell. It’s over now, apart from a senior project that got put on hold during all this, but I have no classes and no on-campus life after this. I don’t even know what’s going on with the project now, I haven’t gotten any update since the professor told me they would sort things out. I’m secretly hoping they just send me my diploma in the mail and give me credit for it anyway because of all of the shit in the world that happened in the four years I’ve been here.

Here I am, living in a new place with relatives, no longer in my hometown. Now I’ve got to find work, and get on my feet which isn’t going to be easy. I don’t know how my knees will handle physical jobs, and I don’t even know how I’m going to get around without a license. When I am ready to get out on my own, where will I go? I’ll have to uproot again.

I don’t know when I’ll have a decent amount of privacy, and I’m scared. I can’t come out now even more than ever, I don’t want to jeopardize my living situation. Yet I can’t stay hidden away any longer, it hurts.

I’m not sure what’s in store, and I have very little short term to focus on, so I just feel like I’m just another deadbeat, even though none of this is my fault.

I don’t know where I’m going with this, but I just wanted to write something.